Considering something and I'd like input...

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aileen_c

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I'm sure mostly the active ones here know our story with what went on with the house and why the kids & I ended up moving back to Illinois to our house.

Since moving back we have been struggling to get back on our feet since the move and all its' expenses were not government sponsored. Of course we have worked on a budget and have been following it pretty closely....as it stands if we stay on course and maybe sacrifice just a bit more we will get current on our house payment.

The hubby presented to me today a program from the government that will provide us assistance in one of four ways:


HAP provides assistance in four ways. For eligible applicants, the Government may:
  1. Reimburse you for part of your loss from selling your home.
  2. Assist you, if you don’t have funds from the sale of your home to pay-off your mortgage.
  3. Purchase your home by paying off the mortgage.
  4. Help, if you default on your mortgage.
This is only available to military homeowners in a specified timeframe. We meet that timeframe and the eligibility requirements.

So right now as it stands I am torn. Since June 2007 we have moved 4 times. We potentially can walk away from this house using this program but I'm just conflicted with the idea of moving the kids again. Of course we'd stay in the same town, possibly same area, not changing schools at all. But I am torn at the loss of a yard for the kids, my neighbors, the cute neighborhood we live in and the quick commute to the school/amenities.

Thoughts??
 
You seem to be a wonderful mom whose world revolves around her kids. You know what you can actually accomplish, and what is best for your kids. Usually what is best for the kids - is time with their mom. If keeping the house will cause you to be away from them more than you had planned, then... is it really what is best for them? But if you can do it without spending more than the planned time away from them, then sacrifice and keep the house. We sacrificed a lot when I was little. Guess what, I lived! :)
 
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Aileen:
since you have sacraficed so much already, there are a couple of questions for you to answer for yourself in reaching your decision.

1. How long before your husband joins you in Ill?
2. Is his housing in Calif currently base housing?
3. If/when he joins you in Ill, will he then be out of the service, or just at a different duty station?
4. If he is getting out, do you plan to stay in Ill?

5. How long will you need to sacrifice before you are current with your mortgage? Is the sacrifice that severe that it is grueling on you and the kids? How do you feel about this?

If you can get current in a reasonable amount of time (say, within the next 3 or 4 months) & your mortgage company allows you that luxury, then I would stay put.

If your husband will not be joining you permanently soon....then I would have to reconsider.

Don't answer for me.....answer to yourself.....for yourself.......
I find that a pen & paper & a list of pros & cons often help me to decide.

Good luck....

Cheryl
 
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military families don't move 'cause they want to, they move 'cause they HAVE to.....
Aileen, how "non-current" are you with the mortgage??
IF his is your HOME, sacrifice a little more.....IF this is a "house", you CAN afford to move one more time, or, until hubby's future is a little clearer.
We know you are asking, because you miss being a family, all together, and don't know what to do.....if it's "home", draw the line in the tarmac.
 
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Aileen,
First I am sorry to hear what you and your family are going through. This housing market has really taken a toll on so many people. I believe that if you can make this a business decision and tryyyyy to keep the emotional part out, your answer will become clearer.

Just a thought and I wish you the very best.
 
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Aileen, moving isn't really a big issue... living in a situation where the stress can take a toll is.

V
 
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Aileen,
I am a navy brat can't tell you how many times I moved when I was little...I know some of the moves were on the spur of the moment. I know that my mom was torn when my father went to Groton, CT She agonized over the move I was just going into 10th grade..
She wanted us to be a whole family...but liked where she was and was afraid of the unknown..I don't know how or why she made the decision but we ended up in CT and stayed there with my mom & dad...better for all of us. I hope this helps, being a military family has a lot of stress attached to it period...
Becky
 
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Aileen,

I know you moved back to Ill because of the house. If you didn't have the house would you be back in California with Hubby today?

Are you staying because of the house? and the foundation of permanence that it brings?

If hubby is in the service for the long haul or not getting out soon. How long can you go living apart. What about the kids missing Dad and his guidance?

A house is just brick and wood. A family is.....
 
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As it stands, Hubby can put in a transfer to Chicago in a couple months....if approved he will transfer next May. The Commanding Officer for the Chicago region wants the hubby to request Chicago and has already told him that he would approve his request. It seems like he has it in the bag but I don't count on it as this is the Marine Corps we're talking about.

This house is not just a house it is our home....I understand other houses can be a home as well but for now we've been through so much already in the past 2 years that I don't know if I have the energy to go through with the sale of a house and moving on my own.

Just to have our house looked at we'd have to offer our house at $154k since the house across the street just sold for that in a short sale. UGH...that's less than what we paid for it.
 
What about my job?? I KNOW....it's one of the factors that is pulling me to the "just sacrifice a bit more". When his transfer came in May 07, I had just graduated the course from FDI and literally had a job lined up from Deb (FlowerDeb)-who really didn't want me to move :) but I chose the path of keeping the family together.
 
CHERYL BAKIN said:
Don't answer for me.....answer to yourself.....for yourself.......
I find that a pen & paper & a list of pros & cons often help me to decide.
Click to expand...

Exactly my suggestion also. Good luck to you, Aileen!
 
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