This is one of the funniest things I've ever read! (Had it been me,
however,
I may have had a different point of view.)
This just tells you how hard it is to be single nowadays. This
was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno.
Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first
date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date
experience.
There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
Marilyn said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and
the guy had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip (no
overnight).
No, not Marilyn. They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met
before.
The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were
headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the
mountain
when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that
extra
latte.
They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and
in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it,
which
she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow
going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and
let
her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,
yanked her pants own and started. Unfortunately, in the deep snow she
didn't
have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to
steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for
traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the
rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she
soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her
pants,
the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the
car's
fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to
mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was
quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme
cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor she answered
her date's concerns about "what was taking so long" with a reply that
indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and needed some help"! He came
around
the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she
looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.
She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
compose themselves, they saw her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as
the
situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it
would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the
icy
metal!
Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the
first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get
her
free so, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to
unzip
his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As for the Tonight Show... she took the prize hands down ...or
perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was
embarrassing! This gives a whole new meaning to being "pissed off".
Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband
and was sitting next to her on the Leno show
____________
however,
I may have had a different point of view.)
This just tells you how hard it is to be single nowadays. This
was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno.
Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first
date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date
experience.
There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
Marilyn said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and
the guy had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip (no
overnight).
No, not Marilyn. They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met
before.
The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were
headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the
mountain
when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that
extra
latte.
They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and
in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it,
which
she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow
going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and
let
her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,
yanked her pants own and started. Unfortunately, in the deep snow she
didn't
have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to
steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for
traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the
rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she
soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her
pants,
the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the
car's
fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to
mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was
quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme
cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor she answered
her date's concerns about "what was taking so long" with a reply that
indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and needed some help"! He came
around
the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she
looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.
She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
compose themselves, they saw her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as
the
situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it
would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the
icy
metal!
Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the
first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get
her
free so, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to
unzip
his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As for the Tonight Show... she took the prize hands down ...or
perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was
embarrassing! This gives a whole new meaning to being "pissed off".
Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband
and was sitting next to her on the Leno show
____________