Why Does This Still Upset Me?

[Connie]

Yesterday I sat with a group of young (20s) adults at dinner, and one couple, knowing I am a florist, smugly told me that they got all of their wedding flowers wholesale, and that a friend put them together for their wedding. They were not trying to be rude to me, they were just very pleased with themselves.

Last week a bride took 2 hours of my time showing me her array of ribbon choices, pictures of roses, her dress, the bridesmaids dresses, and on and on. Then she announced that she was buying her roses online for .55 cents each and someone had told her that I would give her a good deal on arranging them. She seemed to honestly think that there was nothing wrong with this.

No, I do not charge a consultation fee. You just cannot get a separate fee for that in this area. I've tried and tried. Usually I do not talk with a bride without an appointment, but I've been dealing with a lot of walk-ins this summer. Business is pretty good this summer, but money is tight, so it's not easy to turn away potential business.

 

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

Connie....

understand that the "pinch" you are feeling is being felt, first and foremost, by your "customers" as well!!
Having said that...this hypothetical "good deal on arranging flowers" should and must be charged per hour, according to your required hourly rates!!
Also, you MUST make the stipulation that THEY MUST supply you with ALL of the necessary product, in order for YOU to do THEIR work!!
There is no use in "accepting" the fact that they've bought their flowers outside your realm, but, they CANNOT be allowed to scam you for greens, gyp, fillers, holders, containers, floral finishing products, etc., etc.!!
It's either ALL or nothing!!

 

[Victoria]

God, I too am sick of this crap. I spent much time with a bride and her mother two weeks ago. I then spent more time building an itemized estimate per their specifications. They came in the other day, to inform me that they decided to do their own flowers, but will buy the stems from this shop. I then spent time giving them a cost out of the flowers. Now, if they "decide" they want me to do the bouts and corsages, "how much notice" do I need. To be honest, if I never see them again, it's ok by me... and that's a very difficult thing for me to admit.

I've never encountered brides like the ones in this store in my life... they are dreadful.

V

 

[bloomz]

I think I would say no to that Victoria. If they futz up the bouquets and you did the corsages your name is still going to be on it as responsible party for their friends, and they likely aren't going to tell their friends they were too cheap to have you do the whole thing.
Just connecting your name with their work sounds shaky to me.

 

[PhillyPhlorist]

Hate to say it...

...but this is a preview of things to come...or, the next "generation" of 'Basement Bettys'...

We get MANY calls over her asking if we would arrange flowers bought somewhere else. It is always a no. I compare it to bringing your own slab of meat to 'Le Bec Fin' and asking them to cook it for you...in addition to being thrown out on your arse, you would be roughed up a bit as well.

The most recent of this "own flowers" thing happened to us this past weekend. The wedding started at approx. $2000 for Calla bouquets, mini-calla bouts, gardenia corsages, etc.. After all said and done, it ended up with FOUR mini calla bouts. The BEST part was that the 2-week limit on changing the weeding & making final payment was comming up, so my designer called the bride to verify things and ask when the final balance would be paid. It was then that she cut everything out. She had ASSUMED that since we didn't hear back from her, that she could just get what she wanted the week before the wedding. Her "friend" ended up doing the bouquets. (the bride has known this all along, but wanted to have a back-up florist ready in case her "friend" backed out at the last minute,. or she didn't like what her "friend" put together for her...)

We have MAJOR problems with flower vendors here. Produce Junction is a big one. They have some OK quality stuff and below wholesale prices (what we pay). Some brides come to us the week of their wedding looking for certaiin flowers - because Produce Junction "didn't have white roses this weeK" and then are SHOCKED that we would charge them retail ($4 a rose) when they could have gotten them at 25 cents each! Stupid people.... In SOME cases, I will special order whole bunches of flowers in for people and keystone the price with them - we don't do ANYTHING to them.. They come in off the truck and right into the cooler. Have to be picked up that day....

I really don't like wedding work to begin with, (for TOO many reasons to list on this post) but the ONLY thing we have left is our design experience and service. For both, it is important to charge accordingly.

- H

 

[BigBloomers]

Ignorance is Wedding Bliss...

We do quite a few weddings year round (about 3-6 per weekend). Here's my 2 cents:

1. Charging for an initial consult creates a potentially dangerous mystery... Brides don't like that idea--especially if other florists aren't charging. Steer clear of that UNLESS you are a VERY exclusing shop with high-end clients..High end shops can get away with that exclusive approach.

2. Charge for your time...ALL of it. Allow your first consult to be free...up to 1 hour. If a bride insists on more of your time without signing the contract, Remind them that you bill at $75/hr and that the clock is now ticking. Require a cc number to continue theses changes and "negotiations" beyond what your free consult offers. That will weed out the litle brats that are just scamming ideas from you....to take to their friend.

3. If a bride books you, lay down the law from the get-go. I allow 1 add'l consult at 15 min max to work out changes (free). Anything else is charged in 15 minute increments. I alos schedule check point dates: Usually 2 total...one a few months after the book, and another 1 month before the wedding. A final check in (no changes allowed) is made 7-8 days prior to the wedding. All check in's are done by a Scheduled phone call ONLY. No random calls, no random changes. All changes must be made no later tha 30 days prior to the wedding. No exceptions (unless they add stuff).

4. Do not EVER work "with" flowers or materials purchased elsewhere. Don't even consider charging for you time hourly. Brides are really quick to pin the blame on someone else if THEY screw up. So if they buy some crappy flowers wholesale from Sam's Club, they WILL expect you to turn their crap into a work of art. And when people notice the poor flower quality, it will be YOU they blame. Bad publicity isn't worth any reasonable hourly wage. Ever.

5. Cheap brides complain the MOST. This is a FACT. I do $10,000 wedding and I do $500 weddings. I have never had a Quality bride complain. My cheapies take up the MOST time and complain after the wedding when their event didn't look like Ryan and Trista's. Steer clear of them!!! I always steered clear of packages, but now we have them. It limits the bs I have to go through with the cheap brides trying to scam stuff out of us. So if you're spending less than $1400, I have a beautiful asortement of PACKAGES to choose from. Keep in mind, the average wedding in the US is up to $25K now...that should mean your average flower order is $2000 - $2500. So expecting at least $1400 to put in the extra time is certainly not asking too much!!!

6. Check your contract, S-P-E-L-L- I-T O-U-T for them. Don't end up with a "you didn't tell me that" bride.

7. Be nice, don't be a best friend. If you get too close, they think you're working for free. They "forget" that you're trying to earn a living. So give your advise as a professional, and then if they need more suggest 2 options: 1) Come in for an add'l consult at $100 or 2) refer her to a wedding planner. At $5000 for a wedding planner, I'm sure your measly $100 will be worth it...or she'll learn to sort out her problems like a big girl---on her own!



Dana

 

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

Please slap us good Dana...

for thinking anything otherwise!!
No wonder you are so good at what you do!!

 

[CHR]

the ONLY thing we have left is our design experience and service. For both, it is important to charge accordingly.

This is very true and well said.

Dana, we're not as firm about follow-ups as you outline in point #3 and we will work with flowers and materials purchased by the bride elsewhere. I actually like it when she brings in her own containers and accessories since it means less shopping around for us to do. Working with someone elses flowers can be tricky but you just need to make sure the paperwork lays out your responsibilities and liabilities. We've used roses from grandpa's garden and orchids from an aunt's farm in Hawaii but always make it clear that we are not responsible for the performance of those flowers. It's also important to thoroughly inspect them upon arrival and make notes of any problems.

Otherwise, I agree whole-heartedly with the balance of your post.

 

[BigBloomers]

Using Outside Materials

CHR-

I agree that a well-written contract will save your booty with the Bride...But it won't do snot for you with the guests and bridesmaids (ie --your subsequent business) if the flowers stink. If she's bring you garbage from a big box, it shows...and maybe el cheapo bride doesn't care about quality, but a high roller guest...a potential client...may think otherwise about using you for anything but an FTD arrangement.

I did a teeny tiny wedding last year... $600 of perfect flowers...hard to find them at the wedding (lol), but an important guest sure saw them, admired the quality, and now we do some pretty nice sized parties for her... Its the total package...you won't find Preston Bailey or Collin Cowee showing up with a box of roses from Costco...And I'm sure your designers are just as talented, so give them something good to work with.

My point is that you're not just satisfying ONE contract with ONE bride. You are impressing hundreds of guests, too. Doing a good job with stunning product is like a free full page ad in a local magazine. Don't let a NON florist dictate YOUR results!! Keep control of your situation so you don't get burned. Like I said, the guests don't see the contract, they don't know that they weren't your flowers, and so if the results are just mediocre..it's ALL on you!

As for brides supplying containers... We used to have a warehouse. Crap stacked on huge metal shelving just outside where the designers worked. One day, a designer was retrieving boxes of product...lost her balance, and broke a few of one of our bride's "supplied" vases that she got at Crate and Barrel on CLEARANCE. Well, I guess you can imagine the reaction I got when I called and told her she'd have to bring us a few extras only 9 days before the wedding (She had already given us 2 extra - 4 broke). Granted, my contract DOES state that we are NOT responsible for breakage, theft, etc..BUT she had 25 tables and now only 23 vases. As you would expect, she couldn't get more becasue Crate didn't have them any longer. We had to recreate the entire concept with our vases. And we had a ticked off bride even though her flowers were perfect in the end. She blasted us on the internet. All could have been avioded if they were our vases from OUR supplier.

Moral: Contracts don't meen squat to a 20 yr old bride. Especially not this "it's all about me" generation. Their mothers are from a real kiss-my-a** generation, too. Granted in court it would hold up, but what she'll do to your reputation till the court date could be pretty rotten. THAT is what it's all about with event work. REPUTATION. Avoid inaccuracies and shortcomings at all costs. Take control of the entire situation and eliminate these odd but totally real possibilities.

Finally, what shop WOULD accept self-supplying brides??!! Why? Please No offense CHR, but I would imagine your only competition there would be basement betty's. If you're OK with the so-so quality of flowers bought at big boxes, then why not offer that budget bride roses wholesale from YOUR shop. Give em to her at $1.50 and get them from flowerbuyer at $.25. She'll get cheap, you'll get more profit and control.

I understand the concept of not saying no to brides. I used to be a Yes Man. Then I was slapped in the face with it a few times and realized what every other event florist already knew... 1 in 4 is a bridezilla...protect yourself. The REAL Yes Men in this industry are the ones with the $15K MINIMUM.

Dana

 

[Connie]

Thanks for all of your thoughtful replies. Thank you for your encouragement and support. I feel fortified now. You are a great bunch of folks!

 

[CHR]

If she's bring you garbage from a big box, it shows...and maybe el cheapo bride doesn't care about quality, but a high roller guest...a potential client...may think otherwise about using you for anything but an FTD arrangement.

If she brings you crap, which we've never had happen, our contracts covers the fact that we can and will refuse to work with inferior products. We think of it like a contactor would - If they are asked to build a home with inferior wood provided by the homeowner, then the contractor would stop until appropriate materials are provided by you or them. Need overtime to make the miracle happen due to their faulty materials? Charge accordingly. IMO, it's simply a relationship of risk to reward.

you won't find Preston Bailey or Collin Cowee showing up with a box of roses from Costco

I've seen Colin Cowee use products - containers, accessories - provided by clients on his show. My bet is that if Donald Trump has tulips flown in from Holland for a special occasion, Preston would say 'Yes, sir' or hear 'you're fired' and someone else would gladly do it. :>: Not to tout Costco, but I've seen worse crap delivered from local wholesalers than what Costco provides, especially in the more rural areas of the US.

Don't let a NON florist dictate YOUR results!!

We let customers dictate our results. If we believe that we cannot deliver what they need within their range of expectations, we say 'no', too - but have found that blanket rules create some unnecessary barriers. Mediocre results are not an option, however.

Take control of the entire situation and eliminate these odd but totally real possibilities.

Many odd but real possibilities still exist...let me tell you about the 5.8 earthquake the morning of a $5K wedding. Other florists deal with weather issues far more extreme than that. We'll never be able to totally eliminate risk, but we can make sure that the rewards are commensurate with them. The trick is to anticipate potential problems and be proactive instead of just reactive.

The REAL Yes Men in this industry are the ones with the $15K MINIMUM.

$15K wedidngs and up are home runs, but florists can score a lot of base hits with smaller events and still produce winning seasons.

FTR, we have a scheudle of fees in place for brides who want to provide their own flowers. Charges include:
- fees for calculating materials needed plus a 20% buffer for breakage/shrink
- supplies/accessories fees
- processing, handling and storage (cooler) fees
- design and prep fees
- delivery and set-up fees

Believe me when I say it would probably be more cost-effective for them to have us handle everything, but in this new world of changing distribution channels, I believe it's important for florists to address the very real possibility that they will be requested to provide such services. I would have considered my own words as heresy 5 years ago.

Some florists will say no, and others will be ready for it and make money doing it.

 

[carol]

I

FTR, we have a scheudle of fees in place for brides who want to provide their own flowers. Charges include:
- fees for calculating materials needed plus a 20% buffer for breakage/shrink
- supplies/accessories fees
- processing, handling and storage (cooler) fees
- design and prep fees
- delivery and set-up fees

Believe me when I say it would probably be more cost-effective for them to have us handle everything, but in this new world of changing distribution channels, I believe it's important for florists to address the very real possibility that they will be requested to provide such services. I would have considered my own words as heresy 5 years ago.

Some florists will say no, and others will be ready for it and make money doing it.

What a good idea.. thank you.. I am going to set up a fee schedule now so that when this situation happens again I can give appropriate options that make sense to the bride and make money for us.
I like the way you think... life changes and we need to also..
Thanks again