Mikey's NOT a happy camper....

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

had to cancel ALL our getaway plans because of one miserable old mother in law!!
I'm REALLY starting to resent her....
Sorry to dump on all of you...my apoligies
Mike

 

[theRKF]

Originally posted by Mikey the Flower Guy
had to cancel ALL our getaway plans because of one miserable old mother in law!!
I'm REALLY starting to resent her....
Sorry to dump on all of you...my apoligies
Mike

Here's a thought.

Buy HER a Getaway trip. (No, not a one-way ticket!)

Let her have some sun, and you get peace.

 

[Victoria]

Ok...dump away, but I have a question...why?

 

[BOSS]

I concur...but her a trip too...as long as its in the opposite direction your heading...

 

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

Watcha think I've been TRYING to do??..

for the last 17, going on 18 years??
We've already wasted over $7,000.00 on trip bookings that suddenly LAST MINUTE, had to be cancelled because she suddenly developed some mysterious ailment, that SUDDENLY disappears a day or two later??
She has been playing a game of tell one family member one thing, then tell the next something else, just to hide her bull****, and it ALL seems to point to MY being the bad guy!!
I've built TWO complete self sufficient living quarters for her, at NO COST, NO RENT to her, and STILL she sits on her fat ***, watching TV...even the days when my kids were home, still young, she didn't lift a finger looking after them, while I was putting in 16 hour days in the construction business, and Sandie was re-launching THIS florist business, probably working more than that.
I'm NOT kidding...ask sandie...she's FINALLY seen the light, along with her sister,and ONE of her brothers!!
Mike

 

[Victoria]

So she gets the pay off with her bad behaviour...I'm a different kind of person, finally having learned my lessons well...there is such a thing as day care for seniors at rest homes at the like. Is that available where you are. I sure as hell wouldn't cancel anything on her behalf!

 

[Victoria]

P.S...are the rest of the family members incapable of taking her on?

God martydom is sooooo lame! Sounds like she has it down to a science.

 

[BBJ (Big Bad John)]

Mikey is really P*SSED!!!!!

You guys and gals should see the fax he just sent me!!!!!

 

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

NOBODY in the family will have her!!

Victoria!! I've tried the "change the scene" attempt, at moving her around from one member to another, just for a change of scenery for her, since obviously we don't get along, and after a couple of times...they WON'T take her anymore.
Mike

 

[Victoria]

I can only imagine how angry and upset you must be Mike, but, I'm seeing an old lady blackmailing, holding as hostages, being abusive and no one is stopping her. I'm not speaking from inexperience...believe me. I'm trying to be careful because I don't have all the facts, but...it will continue as long as it's allowed to continue. Her payoff is what you're seeing now...what's the pay off for the rest of you? Seems to me she's a rather spoiled old person.

I honestly don't believe for one moment that you should cancel your plans...not a snowballs chance in hell, because you're feeding her nasty evil soul.

Just my opinion.

 

[Luc]

i AM SO LUCKY TO HAVE MY MOTHER IN LAW 1400 MILES AWAY.
LUCKY LUKE

 

[BOSS]

Re: NOBODY in the family will have her!!

Originally posted by Mikey the Flower Guy
Victoria!! I've tried the "change the scene" attempt, at moving her around from one member to another, just for a change of scenery for her, since obviously we don't get along, and after a couple of times...they WON'T take her anymore.
Mike

Been there done that....TOLD my dad, if he ever gets like that...Its into the home for him...and I AM serious...

Mikey, try booking a trip, but telling her, you are leaving two weeks later than you really are....don't give her time to get "sick"...

Like to see that fax...I'll bet ya burned out the **** thing....

 

[Victoria]

If no one else will take her, why the should you?

In this area we have elderly outreach programmes...something you maybe should look in to in your area...other than the funeral homes of course. (that warped thing)

 

[theRKF]

Re: Watcha think I've been TRYING to do??..

Originally posted by Mikey the Flower Guy
for the last 17, going on 18 years??
being the bad guy!!
I've built TWO complete self sufficient living quarters for her, at NO COST, NO RENT to her, and STILL she sits on her fat ***, watching TV...

Maybe the next one should be less livable, less sufficient? Lots of stairs (not too loose), no windows ... outhouse?

 

[AKIKO'S]

MIKEY, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVE ALLOWED YOURSELF

to become an ENABLER! It's too late to break the pattern now without some unpleasantness, but you are going to have to do it even if it comes to packing and moving her things, and changing the locks on the doors!

No worse than using TOUGH LOVE on misbehaving kids or alcoholics & drug users. It sometimes works!

Good luck!

Clark

 

[bosslady]

akikos and victoria are right on!!!!.....next time either tell her a different date or GO ANYWAY!!!! cuz you have played right into her hand and she found that out the first time you were willing to change YOUR plans to suit HER.....although this was a really big mistake with her and now to change the pattern it will be really hard....trust me.... you CAN do it....its like getting your kid to sleep thru the night....if you get up every night and give them attention they will keep waking you....you have to change the behaviour.....make your mind up that you are going no matter what....tell her....and GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!she sounds like an absolute control freak and you are the enabler here......if you ever intend to be on your own the time is now.....you will be in my thots here as i do know first hand how difficult this really is....but you can do it.....

 

[Victoria]

Just checking in...

How are you doing?

 

[Mikey the Flower Guy]

thanks V...

here's the scoop....
One day, back in July of 1985, my best friend ( my father in law) and I are sitting in HIS backyard, listening to a Blue Jays game,and he's visibly frustrated at their lack of hitting that game!!
He get's up, asks if I want another Rye and Ginger Ale, walks off, comes back, sits down, gets up, moves his chair in front of me and says " You KNOW that angioplasty I'm going in for??", and I answer "yes"
He says" I wouldn't ask this of my own kids...but, if ANYTHING was to happen to me, would YOU PROMISE ME to look after my wife??"
"Of course"...I promised!!
He NEVER came out of the procedure.
I HATE MYSELF for EVER making that promise!!
Mike

 

[Victoria]

And you've more than lived up to that promise Mike. While I understand you're thinking, I don't believe it's in the best interest of your mental health and the health of the loved ones around you, to continue to play her game...martrydom is not a great mantle to wear...it's way too heavy and destructive.

Your best friend did not, I'm certain, mean for you to allow your life to be disrupted in such a way.

Personally I'd put a stop to it...life is just too **** short to not have joy in it. I did just that and the guilt was fleeting...therapy did help.

*hugs*

 

[theRKF]

Taking care of her might mean having her live in a retirement home. It's not healthy for HER to be able to manipulate you.